Gotcha Day - Year 1

April 15th, we celebrated having Anna Kate a year.  It has been a year of ups and downs.  From our first days with her in China, she did great bonding with me, eating, and sleeping.  She struggled with getting baths, bonding with Kevin, and opening up.  However once we got home, we really saw the battles we would face.  AK was aggressive.  It was all typical behavior, but a struggle we had not seen from her.  She hit and bit to get what she wanted.  Sleeping was our second biggest battle. Jet lag on our and AK's part did not help the anxiety we all had with sleeping.  We tried her crib, nap mat on floor, blow up mattress, my pillow, etc.  This is one area where the therapist was the biggest source of help and encouragement.  AK really seems to be a night owl.  That would be fine, except that as working parents she has to get up at 6:30 am.  So I will have a battle, either at night going to bed at 7:30 pm, or a fight to get up at 6:30 am.  The therapist recommended giving her melatonin to help her calm down for bed time.  What a miracle!  Within a few weeks, we were able to get her into her bed.  Now a year later, we still have to give her the melatonin.  The girl just does not get tired. 

Her aggression has been replaced with such a caring and helpful personality.  She loves to help me whether it is getting/putting up groceries, cooking, and loading/unloading dish washer.  She is temperamental and has her share of meltdowns.  It has been frustrating to us since she seems to forget all ways of communication with us when she has a meltdown.  Kevin and I attended Empowered to Connect conference put on through Show Hope.  I also read Dr. Purvis book The Connected Child and in the middle of reading a few other books.  This conference and book really helped me understand her behaviors and gave many examples to help get past unwanted behaviors.  I will say I am finally feeling we are making progress in this area.  I will admit it is not all AK's fault.  Realizing my personal history and expectations are not my children's responsibility to get past.  My impatience, frustration, and personal history and stress has made this a bigger challenge for myself.  Lately, it has been easier to get her to calm down and talk about what she needs or wants.  When it is not easy and she has to go sit to calm down, it has only taken a few minutes and she is ready to apologize and talk. 

Through the struggles, battles, ups and downs, we do not take for granted how truly blessed we are with Anna Kate.  She really was taken care of so well at MBHOH that we did not have the health or developmental issues others may have faced.  AK is so smart and now puts together three word sentences, sits and reads books with us, and enjoys singing songs.  I appreciate what God has done to change me and strengthen me through this year.