Raising Adopted Children review Part 2

I have finished the Raising Adopted Children book. Below is a summary of other topics discussed in the book. Overall I enjoyed the book. I skimmed through some topics that are not relevant to our situation.

Chapter 10 - International Adoption
* Suggests possible culture camps when the child is older to learn about there culture and heritage. I believe CCAI hosts some similar camps.
* Medical Conditions - Children of different nationalities develop differently. So when the doctors give there growth percentiles compared to American children, it may not be representative for their nationality.
* Some adopted children from China are found to have a scar (similar to a cigarette burn) usually around the abdomen or chest. These scars are believe to be "marks of love" intended to let children know that their birth families loved them.

Appendix
* Recommends that children adopted abroad be readopted in a court in their state of residence in the US. Then you can request the issuance of state birth certificates that will be recognized in all other US state.

Resources
*PACT BookSource
*Tapestry Book catelog - Tell Me Again About the Night I Was Born by Jamie Lee Curtis and The Day We Met You by Phoebe Koehler
*websites: www.adopting.org and www.adoption.com

AL Dossier Documents

I was so surprised Saturday that I had a package from the AL Secretary of State. I mailed the documents on Wednesday that needed to be certified from the AL SOS and received them with the proper letters on Saturday. That may be a record.

I called AGAPE and we are still waiting on clearance reports. She said it could be as long as three months to get them back. On the brighter side, one month down. Please pray that these documents will be processed and returned quickly. We are so eager to start the home study process. I have ran out of paper work. Now everything is out of my hands.

Thanks again for every one's prayers and support.

Raising Adopted Children review

I have made it through the first four chapters of Raising Adopted Children by Lois Ruskai Melina. It has a lot of good information and ideas. I have told Kevin he will need to read this book, so I am marking the good stuff so he will be able to finish it before our daughter arrives. (Ha, Ha)

Chapter One - Transition to Adoptive Parenthood
*It suggested looking into birth preparation classes at local hospital to learn the skills necessary for caring for a baby.
*Look for adoption announcements suitable for adoptive families.
*Keep a journal. (My mother-in-law has already got me a journal. Thank you)
*Suggestions for naming and renaming your child. I may want to do more research in this area.

Chapter Two - Adjustment of the Family
*Suggested making an adoptee's family book which includes pictures of extended family to show her this is her family and all these people love you. This will give me the opportunity to work on my creative abilities or show my lack of.

Chapter Four - Talking about Adoption
*Gives guidance on talking to family members, teachers, and other children.
*Gives guidance on discussions of adoption with child, tone, environment, and appropriateness/understanding of information at different ages.
*Suggests creating a book to tell the story of why the child was wanted, why the child needed a family, and the process we went through to adopt the child, and our first meeting. It should be designed so that a preschooler could understand.

I will update you as I continue to read through this book.

AL Dossier Documents

We got the MS documents (marriage and birth certificates) certified by the MS Secretary of State. Basically this means, we got a pretty piece of paper from the MS SOS with a gold sticker on it. If that is what it takes to make everyone happy, it works for me.

Today I took a half day off to go to Oneonta to get our AL documents notarized. I then went by the County Clerk's office to have them certify the notary. So now I can put them in the mail to the AL Secretary of State. Hurray!

We will still have to go through this process with our home study. If I have not heard from AGAPE by the end of the week, I will give them a call to get an update.

Pumpkin Patch

Although it was a very cold day, we had a fun day at the pumpkin patch. We got some more good pictures for our dossier.









Other family pictures.

Our Adoption in Christ

Last week I started reading "Our Adoption in Christ" given to me by my brother-in-law (Thanks Jonathan). It talks about how we are adopted through Christ (Eph 1:3-5; Gal 4:4-5). God sent His Son to redeem us so that we might be adopted. God invented adoption. It was on His mind before man ever had a mind. God made us for Himself, and adoption is His gracious work to give us the very thing for which we were made.

There is a quote from Wayne Grudem in the text that states...
"God could have given us justification without the privileges of adoption into his family, for he could have forgiven our sins and given us right legal standing before him without making us his children. It is important to realize this because it helps us to recognize how great are our privileges in adoption. Regeneration has to do with our spiritual life within. Justification has to do with our standing before God's law. But adoption has to do with our relationship with God as Father, and in adoption we are given many of the greatest blessings that we will for all eternity."

What I thought was so neat was that Sunday Ryan preached on this very topic. There is now no condemnation ...because we are adopted. We are His children. I am thankful to be adopted by Him and into His family.

Weekly Update

It has been an extremely busy week for me at work. I finally got around to contacting CCAI to make sure I was clear on the notarization process. Let me just say I have been very pleased with CCAI. They always call or email me within 24 hours and don't seem bothered by my constant confusion and questions.

For our AL dossier documents, we have to have them notarized, certified by county clerk and Secretary of State. The adoption petition and financial statements we created and will be able to sign in front of a notary. So they will be notarized as original documents. I will make a copy of other documents (police clearance report, physical exam report, and employer letter). The notary will sign off and seal a separate piece of paper which will be attached to the photocopy and original documents. Essentially the notary is vouching that the photocopy is a replica of the original since the original was not prepared by us and could not be signed in front of a notary. I have confirmed with Blount County and AL Secretary of State that this will work for them. We will see when the time comes.

I am hoping that we can get the forms notarized, certified by county clerk, and sent to the AL Secretary of State within the next week. I just have to work it out with work leaving early or coming in late.

We are planning to go to the pumpkin patch on Saturday. Hopefully we can get a few more dossier pictures taken while we are there.

Weekly Update

I got the police report and job letter issues resolved. The doctor is going to mark my thyroid as normal, so I am waiting on her to resend me the physical exam form with this change. Then, we will be good to start the sealing process for our AL documents. I have already mailed the marriage and birth certificates to MS for certification.

I heard back from AGAPE. The only document they are still waiting to receive back is the Child Abuse/Neglect (CA/N). So I was glad to hear that.

I looked into the Birmingham School of Chinese. The registration for the Spring 2010 semester starts November 1st. They offer a Chinese adult conversation class which consists of 15 one hours sessions on Saturdays from 2-3 in Vestavia, AL.

I have bought two books listed below to read and will have some posts about them. If anyone has any books they recommend, please let me know. I love to read.

*Raising Adopted Children: Practical Reassuring Advice for Every Adoptive Parent by Lois Ruskai Melina

*Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew by Sherrie Eldridge

Sealing Process

The sealing process is the process of getting documents for our Dossier notarized, certified, and authenticated.

Our birth certificates and marriage certificates are certified copies, so they do not have to be notarized. Since they were issued from MS, I have to send them to the MS Secretary of State for certification. I contacted the MS Secretary of States office to verify what needs to be done. I printed a form off their website which I send with the MC and BCs. I plan to mail that this week.

Our other documents have to be notarized and certified in AL. We plan to get the documents notarized in Blount County to expedite the process. After the documents have been notarized, the county clerk's office has to certify the notary. I contacted the Blount County clerk's office to see what we need to do. We just take the notarized documents with a check for $4/document for them to certify. They will do it that day. Then we can mail those documents to the AL Secretary of State for their certification. They say to allow 5 days.

I am not sure if it is best to wait for our home study to be completed to start the sealing process in AL. This is the one document we have not started that will have to go through this process as well. I will need to contact CCAI to get their advice. I am hoping we will be able to start the home study soon.

Dossier Documents Reviewed

I emailed the documents that are required for our dossier to CCAI. They emailed me back with a few revisions.

*Police Clearance Reports - need title of person who signed
*My Employer Letter needs signed last name of preparer
*My Physical Exam Report - see if my thyroid can be marked as normal or need to get a Doctor's Letter regarding the condition

I have gotten the police report and employer letter issues addressed today. I have contacted the doctor regarding the physical exam report. I hope to get it cleared up this week.

Dossier Pictures

We had a great weekend. My nephew, Ethan, went with us to the MSU vs. GA Tech game. We love spending time with him. He cheered hard for the Bulldogs, but it was a loss.



Two years ago, Ethan went with us to MSU vs. LSU game. It was so neat to see how he has grown up. He wasn't scared of Bully this time. Here are some other game pictures.


Ethan and his new friend, Bully.


Ethan after eating a snow cone.


Ethan and Uncle Kevin at the Dawg Walk.

I was looking through old photos to see if we could find any with our dog, Tanner, that could be used. Here is what I found.

Thinking of You

To my Daughter-

You are in my thoughts every minute of every day. I cannot imagine having more love for you than I already have, but I know I will. When we are at the ball games, I think of you being with us and cheering for the bulldogs. When I am at church, I think of you getting to play with the other kids in the nursery. When I see my nephews, I think of what you will be doing or saying when you are their age.

I am starting to realize how hard it will be to wait for you. I am so ready for you to be in our lives. I know God has many things to teach us in the waiting. It will give us the opportunity to prepare as best we can to be good parents, to pray for you and your future, and to learn about the Chinese culture.

I just wanted to let you know we love you.

Spoiled

Ayi Beth is already trying to spoil you. She was out consignment shopping and called to see if I would allow you to have a toy. I think she is already getting the hang of being an Aunt and learning the perks. Being an aunt means you can buy whatever large and noisy toy they want because it doesn’t stay at your house.